Chronic Anxiety, depression, emotional mental weakness, OCD, trichotillomania

I am a 46 year old woman. I have always been emotionally very fragile and vulnerable.

I have to push myself to do daily chores, don’t want to get up or shower. I get stressed when I have so many things to do, my mind cannot take it.

I resort to breaking hair, it’s hard for me to read anything or even watch TV without breaking my hair as I’m constantly stressed and anxious and cannot focus. It seems like my mind works only when I’m fidgeting (breaking hair) otherwise it cannot focus. In order to focus on the topic (which requires any thinking processing) i automatically have to break my hair. I keep trying not to and promise myself. But any small stress triggers it back.

Breaking hair or splitting it is calming as it distracts from the core problem in front of me, which could be work or my loved ones health issue.

I cannot stop thinking about the problem and will keep googling and can do that for days (my mind goes back and back again).
I am emotionally very weak and cannot take any stress, I break down very easily, and become vulnerable and weak and start asking God and people for help (as if they are God and will resolve my issue). The sound of emergency vans makes my chest heavy.

Last few months my daughter has not been feeling well and I’m unable to help, I’m very scared and can’t stop crying and praying or looking online and hoping there is nothing major. I feel like I want to talk to GOd as only he can help me. I wish people were more caring. I have stopped socializing as I cannot talk without bursting in tears if they ask about how we are. Please Note - we have been seeing specialists for her but doctors showed lack of seriousness and empathy.

Please help me with my mental issues. And please bless us with good health.
[Edited by Rolls_s on 2024-06-09 19:16:09]